• By Topher Goggin

    Illustrated by Rick Cunningham

  • Listen to the Show!

    Latest Episode - January 31, 2023: It's time for the announcement of the Disney Dining Tournament winner! Plus Rapunzel's Jukebox, Popeye, Uno, Yogi Bear, and more!

  • Tournament of Disney Dining!

    Voting is complete in the Tournament of Disney Dining. The final champ - Ohana or Le Cellier - is revealed on the new episode of the show. Tap above to listen! Check out the brackets below! * Parks * Resorts * Disney Springs * Quick Service

  • "Plate Eight" Results:

     

    Parks: #2 Le Cellier (56%) def. #1 Sci-Fi Dine-In Theater (44%)

    Quick Service: #5 Flame Tree Barbecue (55%) def. #2 Pecos Bill's (45%)

    Resorts: #1 Ohana (68%) def. #7 Whispering Canyon Cafe (32%)

    Disney Springs: #1 The Boathouse (55%) def. #2 Chef Art Smith's Homecomin' (45%)

     

    "Feastly Four" Semifinals Results:

    #2 (Parks) Le Cellier (59%) def #5 (Quick Service) Flame Tree Barbecue (41%)

    #1 (Resorts) Ohana (71%) vs. #1 (Disney Springs) The Boathouse (29%)

     

  • Not Your Mother's Goose Store

    CHECK OUT THE BRAND NEW 2023 NYMG CALENDAR!

  • Tournament of Disney Sidekicks - CHAMP!

    We've got a winner! After over 3,000 votes, the Tournament of Disney Villains has crowned its champ ... Genie! With a 73%-27% win over Olaf in the finals, Genie had completed his steamrolling of the field to claim the crown. Check out the final bracket below!

  • Not Your Mother's Goose on YouTube!

    Now you can listen to Not Your Mother's Goose bits AND EPISODES on YouTube! SUBSCRIBE NOW!

  • Subscribe to Not Your Mother's Goose!

    Not Your Mother's Goose is now a hilarious podcast! Hosted by Topher Goggin, the NYMG Podcast features the hysterical material from the book, plus BRAND NEW stories, fairy tale "news," fake ads, and "Rapunzel's Jukebox" song parodies you can't miss.

     

    Subscribe and never miss an episode!

     

    Podcast Main Page

    Or click here to listen on:

    ° Apple Podcasts

    ° Spotify

    ° Google Podcasts

    ° YouTube

     

  • Enter the January Drawing!

    Enter your email address to get entered in our HUGE January drawing for the Not Your Mother's Goose book, coloring book, greeting cards, coasters, and a shirt! Plus you'll get insider info from our "Goose Droppings" newsletter on upcoming episodes, projects, and more, PLUS access to a secret, website-only episode! Click to subscribe, check your email for instant access to the episode, and then get lucky in the drawing! Remember to keep an eye on your email to see if you win!

  • Haunted Mansion Wins Tournament of Rides!

  • The Tournament of Rides presented by World of Walt has a champion! From a field of 40 heavyweights, including the newest rides in the park, Magic Kingdom's Haunted Mansion battled through the fray to win the title of the top ride at all of Walt Disney World.
     
    Nostalgia reigned supreme in the finals, as the Haunted Mansion thumped Disney's newest masterpiece, Rise of the Resistance. Picking up nearly 59% of the votes, the Mansion jumped to an early lead on day one of voting and never looked back, simply giving Kylo Ren an invitation to become its 1000th happy haunt.
     
    The win completed a magical run through the bracket for Haunted Mansion, which came in seeded 8th in its own park by the committee (guess we missed the boat on that one...). With wins over Buzz Lightyear, the Seven Dwarfs' Mine Train, Space Mountain, Pirates of the Caribbean, Avatar Flight of Passage, and Rise of the Resistance, the Mansion truly took on contenders of all styles and vintages en route to the championship.
     
    Finals
    #8 (MK) Haunted Mansion (59%) def. #1 (HS) Rise of the Resistance (41%)

  • Relive the action - check out the final brackets!

    * Magic Kingdom * Epcot * Hollywood Studios * Animal Kingdom * Championship *

    Thank you to everyone who cast ballots - we received over 6500 votes over the course of the tournament from Disney fans all over the world. Thanks as well to Herb from World of Walt for presenting the tournament and providing updates on his weekly Disney walkabouts. If you are a Disney fan, be sure to get notifications from World of Walt on Facebook for a trip to the parks nearly every Saturday. Stay tuned to Not Your Mother's Goose for more Disney fun!

     

  • Original Goose: The funny fairy tale book you never knew you needed

    Not Your Mother's Goose is a series of totally irreverent, mega-sarcastic fairy tale recaps for grown-ups, along with hilarious fake news stories and headlines ranging from Old McDonald bombing on Wheel of Fortune after only buying vowels to Pinocchio succumbing to a long battle with Dutch Elm Disease. Add in Rick Cunningham's gut-busting illustrations and you've got a laugh fest you could give as a gift, but that you'll probably just want to keep for yourself. ORDER NOW IN PRINT OR FOR AMAZON KINDLE, INCLUDING KINDLE UNLIMITED

  • Adult Coloring Book!

    Grab your markers and laugh your stress away while you color almost 30 hilarious cartoons drawn by Rick Cunningham, including exclusive material not in the main book!

  • Get the Original Audiobook!

    Want to listen to the original? Get the audiobook edition of Not Your Mother's Goose, read by Earphones and Audie Award-winning narrator Eric Martin (Bad Reception, Hoot Gibson: Vegas Cowboy). Get it now from Audible!

  • Shirts and More

    Get hilarious Not Your Mother's Goose shirts and other great "Goose Crap" merchandise!

  • About Us

    Topher Goggin

    Author/Podcast Host

    Having passed second grade (on the very first try), Topher Goggin is highly qualified to write a fairy tale book like Not Your Mother's Goose. He now works as a small town lawyer in Central Michigan, and announces football and basketball. More info.

    Rick Cunningham

    Illustrator

    Owner of Cunningham's, Rick Cunningham is an award-winning design/illustration studio specializing in marketing support systems, Rick has been seriously devoting more time to fun projects (like Not Your Mother's Goose).

    Eric Martin

    Audiobook Narrator

    Eric Martin is the Earphones and Audie Award winning narrator of nearly 200 audiobooks, including Pulitzer Prize winners and #1 NY Times Bestsellers. He has performed works for The New Yorker and The Atlantic by Michael Chabon, Kurt Vonnegut, and David Foster Wallace. Eric is also the co-creator and writer of original audio series like Bad Reception and Hoot Gibson: Vegas Cowboy, and produced and narrated the full-cast production of the NY Times Monthly Bestseller Stinker Lets Loose! He recently directed and co-starred in the narration of Heads Will Roll, alongside the likes of Kate McKinnon, Tim Gunn, Peter Dinklage, and some lady named Meryl Streep. www.ericjasonmartin.com

    Andrew Mitchell

    Rapunzel's Jukebox Singer

    A college bookstore operator in Boston in "real life," Andrew Mitchell lends us his musical talent when not performing with his funk/soul band, The Othership, and as a new member of the Shittons. Andrew has handled the vocals for most Rapunzel's Jukebox songs, often devising fun arrangements spanning everything from guitar to trombone to kazoo (the third of those being a tribute to his late father, who used to perform as "King Kazoo").

     

    * Rapunzel's Jukebox

    * Andrew on Facebook

    * The Othership

    * The Othership on Facebook

     

  • Contact Us

    Email
×
Terms & Conditions
Terms and Conditions  
====================

Last updated: September 29, 2019

Please read these Terms and Conditions ("Terms", "Terms and Conditions")
carefully before using the http://www.notyourmothersgoose.com website (the
"Service") operated by Tophini, LLC ("us", "we", or "our").

Your access to and use of the Service is conditioned upon your acceptance of
and compliance with these Terms. These Terms apply to all visitors, users and
others who wish to access or use the Service.

By accessing or using the Service you agree to be bound by these Terms. If you
disagree with any part of the terms then you do not have permission to access
the Service.

Intellectual Property  
---------------------

The Service and its original content, features and functionality are and will
remain the exclusive property of Tophini, LLC and its licensors. The Service
is protected by copyright, trademark, and other laws of both the United States
and foreign countries. Our trademarks and trade dress may not be used in
connection with any product or service without the prior written consent of
Tophini, LLC.

Links To Other Web Sites  
------------------------

Our Service may contain links to third party web sites or services that are
not owned or controlled by Tophini, LLC

Tophini, LLC has no control over, and assumes no responsibility for the
content, privacy policies, or practices of any third party web sites or
services. We do not warrant the offerings of any of these entities/individuals
or their websites.

You acknowledge and agree that Tophini, LLC shall not be responsible or
liable, directly or indirectly, for any damage or loss caused or alleged to be
caused by or in connection with use of or reliance on any such content, goods
or services available on or through any such third party web sites or
services.

We strongly advise you to read the terms and conditions and privacy policies
of any third party web sites or services that you visit.

Termination  
-----------

We may terminate or suspend your access to the Service immediately, without
prior notice or liability, under our sole discretion, for any reason
whatsoever and without limitation, including but not limited to a breach of
the Terms.

All provisions of the Terms which by their nature should survive termination
shall survive termination, including, without limitation, ownership
provisions, warranty disclaimers, indemnity and limitations of liability.

Indemnification  
---------------

You agree to defend, indemnify and hold harmless Tophini, LLC and its licensee
and licensors, and their employees, contractors, agents, officers and
directors, from and against any and all claims, damages, obligations, losses,
liabilities, costs or debt, and expenses (including but not limited to
attorney's fees), resulting from or arising out of a) your use and access of
the Service, or b) a breach of these Terms.

Limitation Of Liability  
-----------------------

In no event shall Tophini, LLC, nor its directors, employees, partners,
agents, suppliers, or affiliates, be liable for any indirect, incidental,
special, consequential or punitive damages, including without limitation, loss
of profits, data, use, goodwill, or other intangible losses, resulting from
(i) your access to or use of or inability to access or use the Service; (ii)
any conduct or content of any third party on the Service; (iii) any content
obtained from the Service; and (iv) unauthorized access, use or alteration of
your transmissions or content, whether based on warranty, contract, tort
(including negligence) or any other legal theory, whether or not we have been
informed of the possibility of such damage, and even if a remedy set forth
herein is found to have failed of its essential purpose.

Disclaimer  
----------

Your use of the Service is at your sole risk. The Service is provided on an
"AS IS" and "AS AVAILABLE" basis. The Service is provided without warranties
of any kind, whether express or implied, including, but not limited to,
implied warranties of merchantability, fitness for a particular purpose, non-
infringement or course of performance.

Tophini, LLC its subsidiaries, affiliates, and its licensors do not warrant
that a) the Service will function uninterrupted, secure or available at any
particular time or location; b) any errors or defects will be corrected; c)
the Service is free of viruses or other harmful components; or d) the results
of using the Service will meet your requirements.

Exclusions  
----------

Some jurisdictions do not allow the exclusion of certain warranties or the
exclusion or limitation of liability for consequential or incidental damages,
so the limitations above may not apply to you.

Governing Law  
-------------

These Terms shall be governed and construed in accordance with the laws of
Michigan, United States, without regard to its conflict of law provisions.

Our failure to enforce any right or provision of these Terms will not be
considered a waiver of those rights. If any provision of these Terms is held
to be invalid or unenforceable by a court, the remaining provisions of these
Terms will remain in effect. These Terms constitute the entire agreement
between us regarding our Service, and supersede and replace any prior
agreements we might have had between us regarding the Service.

Changes  
-------

We reserve the right, at our sole discretion, to modify or replace these Terms
at any time. If a revision is material we will provide at least 30 days notice
prior to any new terms taking effect. What constitutes a material change will
be determined at our sole discretion.

By continuing to access or use our Service after any revisions become
effective, you agree to be bound by the revised terms. If you do not agree to
the new terms, you are no longer authorized to use the Service.

Contact Us  
----------

If you have any questions about these Terms, please contact us.